This year, we’re actually not too frustrated by the holiday buzz and have been out and about, braving the crowds, hitting the stores, and hunting down sugar plums. Our journey, not surprisingly, has brought us face-to-face with all kinds of customer service dilemmas and conundrums. So it was an absolutely perfect coincidence when we ran into, who many might deem the “king” of customer service, Santa Claus! He was admittedly a little down and out. We’re not sure why, but he was thrilled to offer our readers his advice on strengthening customer relationships. It’s not the most conventional advice we’ve heard, and we’re not sure if he’s for real, but lest we get coal in our stocking…
Ho ho ho. Santa Claus here. Im here today to give you business owners some tips on good customer relations. After all, who is more popular than me? Ive been around forever, and have almost 100 percent approval ratings! Ive mastered the formula on what it takes to win consumers over, so take these tips as my Christmas present to you.
Invite Customers to Sit on Your Lap. While theyre there, promise that youll give them whatever they want, including lots of nifty toys and gadgets and laugh heartily for no reason. Customers will love you for doing this.
Tell your customers that youre keenly aware of their good and bad behavior. Its well known that customers want to be looked after, but most businesses forget that they also want to be looked into. A very popular song even sings my praises for my ability to know when youve been sleeping, not to mention naughty. I was doing this wayyyyyyyyy before Facebook took it mainstream. Remember: When customers see that you know all the intimate details of their lives, they know it means you care.
Break into peoples houses uninvited. If anyone gets upset, just reassure them that youre bringing stuff into the house, not taking anything out. Who is going to complain about that?
Give everything away. Dont charge for anything. You have a choice: you can be profitable, or you can be popular. Making everything free may not do much for your bottom line, but I guarantee it will make you extremely popular with customers.
Make deliveries only once a year. Customers really, really look forward to getting their goods when you only deliver them one day a year.
Follow these simple rules and your holiday season will be a memorable one!